Morphed

a girl in the world

Photo by The Cleveland Museum of Art on Unsplash

I’m just a girl
I’ve always been a girl

I’m a young lady who twirls dutifully in pink tutus,
a teen in tie dye flirting with spotlights
I’m a child bride of twenty-six who forgets to wear blue

I’m an eight year old dive-bombing the Slip-n-Slide for dear life
feeling like anything is possible if I can catch enough air and flight

I’m the girl in the dive bar with no bra and a heart beating out of her chest, waiting for someone to notice me
hoping no one does

I’m a girl on a subway trying to look tough
slinking and trying to avoid assault like the plague
If you chase me in the dark I’m a feral beast with mace spray
I will laugh as you faceplant in asphalt with a roar

I’m the girl buying a Corona tall boy at a dollar store
where the old fat cashier doesn’t glance to check my i.d.
I’m a girl at any time in the park, swinging for the moon
I’m fifteen on the tennis court with a boy who makes me swoon

I’m the girl crying over boys who will never remember me
I’m a muse for poetry and song
based on crooked sketches in boy brains

There are x-rays of me that look sharp,
but miss my secret exoskeleton
my sticky fluids remain unseen
I’m a girl who runs from love until it runs first
nothing lasts or ever quenches my salty thirst

I’m ignored when I finally want to be seen
I could be naked in the street
someone might offer me a sheet

I’m smooth as marble, flawless as a Rodin
except Claudel clawed the rough clay of me
in her mad brilliance
while he ate grapes and waited for glory

I’m a girl getting my chest cut open with a handsome surgeon’s blade -
now no longer smooth, but a jagged tapestry

I’m a girl with no baby
I don’t get a parade
I’m a sperm and an egg deciding to be unfree

I’m a girl with no dad; no one is sad
except the ghosts who are sweet
as I lay under a heavy sleet that almost drowns me every day

I’m a girl with a future sulking on a stoop,
a girl with no future pining for the stoop

I’m a girl with round pills that keep my womb empty -
a girl with square patches to keep me a girl for longer

I’m a girl no matter what anyone else has to say
A girl is nothing but a dank cave painting they smear blood on anyway
to gawk at and kiss, scratch, grab, forget, miss
Eventually it dries out and
a girl can fade away

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Yeah, I am reclaiming tapestry, up yours AI! 😉Thanks for reading!